There Is A Solution For Working Women . . . And Men
 
 
The facts are in and it’s true: Women are not in the kitchen as much as they were in the Ozzie and Harriet days. To this I’m sure some would admonish women to get back in the kitchen. But hey, they’re not slacking off—they’re at work.
 
As more women entered the workplace, rising to 46.5 percent in 2002-03 from 18 percent of the labor force in 1901, the amount spent on eating outside the home also rose. In 1960, families were spending 21 percent of their food budgets on restaurants. Today, families are spending 42 percent—twice as much of their food budget—on restaurants. “Who has time to cook dinner?” most any working woman (or man) would say.
 
CNN reports the facts bear out the scarcity of time: 
 
We have become a workaholic nation. American workers put in the longest hours of any industrialized nation, surpassing the next closest country, Japan, by nearly two full work weeks a year. Now a new study by Families and Work Institute finds we’re paying a price. Twenty-four percent of American workers work 50 or more hours a week. Twenty-two percent work six to seven days a week.
 
 
Tip:  Men and women put pressure on your companies to make it a policy that everyone leaves at a reasonable hour so they can have a life outside of work. It needs to be publicized that meetings don’t begin at 5 pm. It needs to be promoted that staying in your cubicle after hours is not a badge of visible loyalty. It needs to come from the top that having a life outside of work is encouraged. And when a company walks its talk, it deserves the publicity. So, I say add this to the criteria for the Best Companies for Working Mothers . . . and Fathers! And let people know which companies are heading in the right direction!
 
 
Further Reading:
 
Website, U.S. Department of Labor, Bureau of Labor Statistics, 100 Years of U.S. Consumer Spending
 
Website, Lisa Anderson, Chicago Tribune, Shuck past, and let good times roll
 
Website, CNN.com, Overworking
 
Website, Families and Work Institute
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Tags: business, women, working, kitchen, hours, worked, work-life, balance

Women Want Jobs That Give Them Choices
 
I’ve been hearing a lot lately about career women dropping out when they have children. The Washington Post has told us that there are only 147,000 stay at home dads in the entire U.S. I certainly understand how women feel about the paucity of choices available to them when they have a baby. I know many women would love to find a company that would offer them the following options:
 
A sabbatical of 1 to 5 years to start a family
 
A flex-time arrangement when they return
 
A choice to work from home part of each week
 
Guess what? There’s a company that now offers all of the above! Women, run to it! It’s Deloitte & Touche. And run to IBM, Ernst & Young, and maybe General Electric (soon, but not quite yet). And if you’re not working for a forward-thinking company, show them the models they should be emulating. They won’t have to reinvent the wheel—they can follow the leaders.
 
And let’s not leave Daddies out of this—they should get the same options. Our children will be better off than previous generations if Dads could be generous with their time as well. And you know what? Surveys show young men are placing family time higher up there on the priority list than ever before!
 
I say what’s best for a woman is letting her have choices. If she wants to stay active in her career and raise a family, this should be possible. After all, a prospective mother should look at the statistics and realize she may, at some time, be in the 50% of women who are divorced and are looking for ways to support themselves as well as their children.
 
 
Tip:  Collect information on forward-thinking companies and make a practice of letting others know. Here’s a start, the top 10 companies for working mothers determined by Working Mother magazine:
Bristol-Myers Squibb
Discovery Communications
Eli Lily
IBM
Johnson & Johnson
J.P. Morgan Chase
PricewaterhouseCoopers
S.C. Johnson & Son
AFLAC
Wachovia
 
Look below to see the top 100 companies and send in your resume, pronto!
 
 
Further Reading:
 
 
Website, WomensMedia, by Catalyst, Building a Flexible Workplace
 
Website, Working Mother magazine’s Top 100 Companies for Working Mothers
 
 
Website, WashingtonPost.com, Amy Joyce, More Fathers Figure on Family Time
 
Website, USA Today, Stephanie Armour, Moms Find it Easier to Pop Back into the Workforce
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Tags: business, women, mothers

Running From Criticism Is Not A Good Thing!
 
Ann Handley, on the MarketingProfs blog, says, “I’ve noticed an overwhelming number of male “commenters,” but far fewer female commenters.” Why does this happen on her blog? And I ask, “Why does it happen in meetings? Why does it happen most any time men and women are in a public forum?” Admit it, we’ve all noticed men enjoy taking the floor, expounding their views, and combating any vitriolic comments hurled at them. Women—reading that last sentence—are probably already withering at the idea of setting themselves up for this type of verbal combat. But we’ve got to start doing this more and using our logic to show where the criticisms may be in error. And, for the worst-case scenario, if we see they’re right, let’s admit it and move on. It’s usually not life or death. My advice to women is Stop Fearing Criticism!
 
Why are men better at letting criticism roll off their backs? (I know I should say “generally better,” but forget about that! Go ahead, criticize me!) The answer is sports! We can credit some of this to the sports boys play. They get used to coaches yelling at them and accept that this is how they’ll improve at a sport. After a while, they don’t take it personally. Maybe this is where Title IX (gender equality in sports) will help girls the most. The more sports they play, the stronger they’ll become—physically as well as personally.

How should you deal with criticism that comes your way? On WomensMedia, business consultant Pat Heim instructs women to draw a box around it and then let it go. You can do this in three steps:

1. Tell yourself, “The criticism is this person’s opinion about this behavior at this time.”
2. Consider the source of the criticism. Analyze if the attacker was motivated by a need to undermine you, or a need to help you.
3. Figure out what you need to learn from this event and then drop it.

This last point is key. If you can’t let go of the criticism, several things can happen:

1. It may damage your relationships with others. (You can obsess about it and read into a coworker’s behavior a negative agenda.)
2. It can undermine your colleagues’ confidence in your abilities. (Men may perceive you as weak if you “can’t take the heat” or “learn from your mistakes.”)
3. It can put you at risk of further attacks. (Once a man realizes you’re vulnerable, he may attack you again—just part of his competitive game.)
4. It can reinforce negative self-talk (a debilitating habit that undermines confidence).

You can’t avoid criticism, so stop running from it. The best advice is to learn from the criticism and then just let it go.
 

Tip:  Promise yourself right now that the next time you have an opportunity to speak your mind, you won’t run the other way.

Visit our website, www.WomensMedia.com, for Expert Advice for Working Women. 

 
Further Reading:
 
Podcast (just a few minutes), Working in Heels, by Nancy Clark, Learn How To Say “No” Like You Mean It —Get Rid Of The “Shoulds” And Say “No” Without Guilt!   Podcast (just a few minutes), Working in Heels, by Nancy Clark, Powerful Body Language For Working Women —Women, Change Your Body Language, Change Your Message Blog, Ann Handley, MarketingProfs,  “Since When Do Women Have Nothing to Say?”
 
Website, WomensMedia, Making the Most of Criticism and Praise, by Pat Heim with Susan K. Golant
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Please see Challenging Gender Stereotypes.

You may also be interested in the Top 12 Put-Downs to Women in the Workplace.

Visit our website, www.WomensMedia.com, for Expert Advice for Working Women. 

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Tags: business, women, stereotypes, stereotyping