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You’ve just finished an effective presentation, sales call, or meeting, and it’s time for the inevitable (and often dreaded) question-and-answer session.

For many people, the most frightening part of any conversation is the unscripted part. Suddenly your mind goes blank and the nightmare begins. What if someone asks you a question you can’t answer? What if a listener turns hostile? What if someone monopolizes your thinking and wipes your brain clear of all relevant knowledge?

How you handle questions and answers can either make or break your credibility and your opportunity to build a relationship with your audience. Both the content of your answers and your behavior in delivering those answers play critical roles in how you handle questions and answers.

Do’s

To deliver brief, clear answers that help to strengthen your credibility and overcome any hostility or negativity, do …

1. …connect with the questioner’s eyes to show them you are listening. Be careful not to interrupt the questioner; if you don’t wait for the entire question, your answer may be inadequate.

2. …direct the first two sentences of your answer to the questioner when presenting to two or more people. Then, to keep your listeners involved, direct the remainder of your answer to the entire group.

3. …at the end of your response, provide closure by asking the questioner, “Does that answer your question?” Another option is to end the response by visually connecting with the questioner and nodding your head for closure.

4. …keep your answers brief. Answer only what has been asked. If you elaborate on your answer you run the risk of getting off track, not answering the question and losing the attention of your listeners.

5. …ask for clarification in the following situations:

• When the question is unclear

• When the questioner asks several questions and you need to determine which to answer first

• When someone makes a statement and you are unclear whether they are looking for a response or merely voicing an opinion.

Don’ts

To help strengthen your credibility, don’t …

1. …fidget, avoid eye connection, lean or take steps backwards, away from your listeners.  Instead, communicate that you are open and willing to take questions by standing still and staying focused on your listeners.

2. …raise your voice, speak with an aggressive tone, or invade the questioner’s space as you are answering a question. Instead, maintain your composure, remain calm and answer the question with poise and dignity.

3. …exclaim, “Good question!” Most speakers use this comment as a filler to buy time while they search for an answer. Instead, simply pause to give yourself time to think.

4. …use the words “but” and “however” when answering a question. These words communicate, “You’re wrong and I’m right.” This invites your questioner to fight back or dispute your position. Nothing productive can result from “but” and “however” when used in this context.

5. …repeat the listener’s question unnecessarily. Repeating a question can be helpful if you think that other listeners didn’t hear it. Ask the questioner to repeat the question to clarify any miscommunication.

Effectively managing questions and answers can help to communicate your knowledge of the topic to your listener.

Be sure to visit our site, WomensMedia to get Expert Advice for Business Women.

For quick updates for Business Women you should follow NancyFClark on Twitter, or StaceyHanke here.

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On our website, WomensMedia you should read this: 10 Tips From Gretchen Rubin on How to Be Happy at Work

and you may benefit from this:  Business Communication: 5 Tips for Building Your Authority.

It may help to listen to:

Gender Communication with Authority And Care —A Business Woman Can Be Careful Without Losing Her Authority
or read the blog here.

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By Stacey Hanke (Read about her here.)

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You are an expert within your industry and feel confident with your level of knowledge. You are frequently invited to share your knowledge with small to large groups and have delivered the same message on numerous occasions. The night before a typical delivery you review your notes, make a few adjustments to the PowerPoint slides and voilà — you’re ready to rock ’n’ roll.

Who really has time to prepare for a presentation with the same level of focus and precision as an athlete uses to prepare for the U.S. Open, Stanley Cup, Super Bowl or World Cup? Well, I can’t imagine that professional golfer Phil Mickelson simply reviews his form and swing the night before a tournament, without having a deep understanding of his success strategy weeks prior to the event.

Just like an athlete, musician or actor, if you want to perform at the top of your game you need to think about how your communication impacts others.

Too often we arrive at a presentation, sales call, or meeting with an “A to Z” plan and are unwilling to veer from that plan. We fear we’ll lose our train of thought or be perceived as inadequate or lacking requisite knowledge. We talk too much, confuse our listeners and become a talking head.

An effective communicator is someone who can change her message on the fly to meet her listeners’ needs and expectations. Although this might seem obvious, most of us tend to be deficient in this skill. The message is not about you! It’s about putting your listeners into your story. When you tap into your listeners’ emotions and what’s important to them, you will influence them to take action.

Prior to a presentation, sales call, meeting, face-to-face conversation or even sending an email, take time to apply the acronym K.N.O.W.

K – What is the knowledge level of your listeners?

N – What do your listeners need to know to take action in the allotted time?

O – What are your listeners’ opinions on your subject?

W – Who are your listeners?

When identifying who your audience members are, ask yourself the following questions:

•  What do they know about the topic being discussed?

•  What do I want them to know about the topic?

•  What are their expectations?

•  How do I want them to feel about the topic?

•  How will the action I want them to take benefit them?

•  What behavior do I want them to change as a result of my message?

•  What preconceived ideas do they have about my topic?

•  What’s their past experience with this topic?

•  What’s important to them?

•  What impact will their decisions have on decision-makers, clients or peers?

•  Why is this message being delivered now?

•  What are my listeners’ goals?

•  Will my message contain more information than my listeners need or want to hear? If so, how do I plan to prioritize the key points and concepts?

•  Why should my listeners be interested in this particular topic?

•  What are three challenging questions my listeners might ask?

When you take the focus off of yourself, you are able to put all of your energy into what matters most: influencing your listeners to take action. Isn’t that what communication is all about?

Be sure to visit our site, WomensMedia to get Expert Advice for Business Women.

For quick updates for Business Women you should follow NancyFClark on twitter here, or StaceyHanke here.

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On our website, WomensMedia you should read this: Women in Business: Stop, Look, Listen and Succeed

and you may enjoy this: 8 Great Strategies for Working Any Room

It may help to listen to:

Business Communication Skills: Less Is More, So Get to the Point!
or read the blog here.

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As a woman in a male-dominated field, entertaining clients and building relationships through social contact are vital activities, though not always straightforward. For example, as an executive coach who specializes in working with professional women, I have yet to meet a woman who has the interest or time to take a client golfing, a long held networking tradition for men.

Women who want to develop relationships during office hours, through activities traditionally associated with male-dominated fields, such as drinking or at sporting events, are rare in my experience. Equally, women don’t tend to enjoy impromptu after-work drinks that go on late into the night. Most women can engage in after-work drinks now and again if given enough forewarning. However, impromptu get-togethers can be difficult for women with families, or even for women who just happen to value their own social lives and time away from work.

Maggie Berry, Director of womenintechnology.org, agrees. She indicated that, for her members, some of the key draws for her events were the focused attention on career development and the advance marketing that allowed women to plan to attend. She explained, “One of the comments I hear is that women can’t just spontaneously decide to go to the pub after work. They have different interests and responsibilities. If you know your team is going out on a Tuesday, you can plan around that. A woman can get the appropriate childcare and make transport arrangements ahead of time. Our members like to network, but like to set time aside specifically for it, rather than having to make themselves available all the time.”

If you avoid socializing completely, you will not be privy to political discussions, strengthening relationships or hearing about career opportunities that are almost always first discussed informally. Furthermore, you will send out the message that you are an outsider with no interest in becoming an insider. That being said, most women recognize that they need to make time to socialize with clients and colleagues on work trips or dinner out, which, while it has its obvious benefits, also has potential pitfalls. In addition to taking up what precious little time working women have, there is the danger of sending mixed messages to clients or colleagues—especially in settings where alcohol is involved.

This is a potential time to shine, as people promote those with whom they feel comfortable and who will make a good impression on their clients. Tread carefully, though, because if you get it wrong, you can backtrack your career considerably. Breakfast, lunch and coffee meetings are unlikely to be misconstrued, and have the additional advantage of being less likely to make you feel obliged to order alcohol with the meal. For example, you can invent a deadline back at the office if need be.

With dinner, you end the evening when you want to go home, which can be harder to negotiate your way out of if your dinner companions pressure you to stay. During the day, you can always say you have a meeting at the office, which is a more socially acceptable way of curtailing the evening than saying you just want to go home. So network please, but in a way that suits you, whether it be with groups that allow you to plan in advance or with meals at times that suit you. Just make sure you do it in a way that is respected, but can’t be misconstrued.

Be sure to visit our site, WomensMedia to get Expert Advice for Business Women.

Or on our website, WomensMedia you should read:

How to Succeed in a Male-Dominated Profession or

Business Women Can Play in the Boys’ Club or

Communicating With Men at Work .

For quick updates for Business Women you should follow NancyFClark on twitter here.

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by Sharon Michaels (Read about her here.)

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Whether you are building an online marketing team, own a storefront with employees, or organize a monthly professional networking group, your leadership skills can often mean the difference between success and failure.

What are the traits of a great leader?

Interestingly enough, in 1954 Raymond Cattell developed a Leadership Potential Equation. This equation was based on the common basic qualities of the top military leaders of World War II. In fact, this equation is still used today as a guide for defining the traits of effective leadership. Here are a few traits from Raymond Cattell’s Leadership Potential Equation:

1. Self-confidence – Self-assuredness, self-confidence and resiliency are common and important traits among top leaders. They trust their own judgment and instincts and do not necessarily need the approval of others to make well thought out decisions.

2. Healthy energy – A leader is well aware that good health is a prerequisite to good leadership. With leadership comes the need to take care of oneself in mind, body and spirit. Healthy energy begins in a healthy body.

3. Enthusiasm – People want to follow positive, energetic, upbeat, optimistic leaders. They want their leader to enthusiastically look for and focus on solutions to day-to-day challenges.

4. Knowledge – A powerful leader should know what she’s talking about. There’s nothing worse than a leader who doesn’t walk her talk. The most charismatic leaders lead by example.

5. Emotional stability – Good leaders handle stress, anger, frustration and disappointment in positive and empowering ways. Emotional maturity is a must for effective leadership.

6.  Empathy – Personal power and recognition must take a back seat to the well being of the team. Empathy builds trust. Without a leader who is trustworthy, there is no team.

7. Charisma – A charismatic leader can rally a team to be and achieve their best. A leader with charisma can paint a vision of the future that her team will want to build upon and aim toward.

8. Goal oriented – Leadership means knowing how to set group goals—goals that will motivate and excite the team to grow and thrive personally and professionally.

I doubt if anyone is born a great leader. It is how a person handles the circumstances they are given that often determines true leadership qualities. Looking through these traits, how do you rank yourself as a leader? Remember, you can learn to lead.

Listen to today’s podcast here.

Be sure to visit our site, WomensMedia to get Expert Advice for Business Women.

On our website, WomensMedia you should read these excellent articles:

7 Steps to the Best Leadership Style and

Leadership Skills: Boost Your Business Acumen! and

5 Things Leaders Must Do to Stop the Gossip Mill

For quick updates for Business Women you should follow NancyFClark on twitter here, or SharonMichaels here.

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“They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel.”  Carl W. Buechner

Have you ever attended a comedy club where the comedians had you laughing constantly? When the lights come on, you were wishing for more because you had a great time and the comedians made you feel good.

Have you ever participated in a meeting, conference call, presentation, or face-to-face conversation feeling the complete opposite? You feel like time isn’t moving. You can’t wait to walk away and you’re bored to tears. Because the speaker is ineffective, you don’t remember the key points or ideas and there is nothing to quote.

Being memorable and quotable requires you to:

• Grab and keep the attention of listeners.

• Be clear, concise and to the point.

• Communicate a message that meets your listener’s expectations.

• Manage the amount of information you share.

Whether you are delivering a presentation, facilitating a meeting of having a face-to-face conversation, you’re objective is to influence action. When you are memorable and quotable, your listeners will remember more of your message for a longer length of time.  As a result, you’ll have more impact and influence on them.

Most of us never get close to being memorable and quotable because we frustrate our listeners. We communicate too much information and our message imparts information overload. Our listeners become frustrated because they begin to feel overwhelmed, confused or exhausted. In most cases, their reaction is to stop listening. They may be nodding their heads, giving you the impression they’re listening, but in reality you have filled their cup to capacity and it is now overflowing.

To make sure your listeners remember and retain the information you are communicating, create your content following “The Rule of Three,” which states that the human mind remembers in groups of three. This explains why we remember our phone numbers and Social Security numbers. When you offer more than three key points, your listeners are busy trying to remember each key point; they walk away with none of them. Keeping your key points to three or less will also help you remember what you came to communicate.

Identify up to three key points that will support your objective, meet your listener’s expectations and influence them to take action. Your key points serve as a road map that provides direction. Key points establish the framework for the action you want your listeners to take as a result of your message.

Always state your most important key point first. I know this sounds obvious, yet how many times have you saved the best for last? If you begin to run out of time, you end up racing through your most important key point, throwing it at your listeners and hoping they will cling to the idea. Often they will miss it!

When you state your most important key point first, you don’t need to worry about running out of time and failing to communicate a critical piece to your message. It’s not a make or break if you don’t have time to communicate your least important key point. Remember, your listeners don’t know what your key points are until you share them.

Leave your listener wanting more. You’ll have more impact on your listeners when you follow the rule of three because they will be able to make a decision to take action. When they walk away feeling frustrated, they end up with nothing!

The more memorable your message becomes, the more quotable you will be. Apply the following elements to your message to make it easier for your listeners to quote you.

• Use stories and examples relating to the experiences of your listeners.

• Speak their language. What phrases or acronyms do they use that you can apply to your message?

• Invite your listeners to connect, engage and interact with you. Ask them questions, have them repeat key take-aways, or restate your key take-aways at least three times throughout your message.

Be sure to visit our site, WomensMedia to get Expert Advice for Business Women.

For quick updates for Business Women you should follow NancyFClark on twitter here, or StaceyHanke here.

Sign up for the WomensMedia Newsletter.  We make it easy!

On our website, WomensMedia you should read this: Add Confidence and Credibility to Your Presentations

or you may enjoy this: 10 Tips From Gretchen Rubin on How to Be Happy at Work

It may help to listen to:

How To Get Motivated —5 Steps For Motivation
or read it here.

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Humans, both men and women, are visual beings. Pretending that we don’t judge one another based on various aspects of appearance, or indeed that we are above such scrutiny ourselves, is a fallacy.

For example, your own quick visual judgments affect the decisions you make about whom to approach at a networking event, or how you guess who is the most senior person in a boardroom.

Image counts. In the absence of other relevant information, you will look for visual clues about who is like yourself, how they regard themselves, how professional they seem. You then will allow whatever they say about themselves to either support or contradict your initial visual impression—not the other way around.

Keep in mind that it is very hard to get someone to adopt a more favorable opinion after they have met you and formed a negative impression. Humans subconsciously look for validation that their first impression, whether negative or positive, was correct. It is easier to start from a position of strength by offering a positive first impression through your image. For the woman looking to raise her profile, addressing one’s image is not an option. It is vital.

The women I interviewed for Beyond the Boys’ Club came from a wide range of industries—from science and tech to consultancy and accounting. They were all dressed in different styles—styles that were completely appropriate for their sectors and for what was on the agenda that particular day. They dressed to have attention focused on what they contributed to the team. Their choices didn’t detract from what they were saying.

For example, Laura Hinton, a partner at PwC, wore suits to work every day. It was part of her persona and had a positive impact on the way she felt about herself. Her formality of dress works for her: she is one of the youngest women at the firm ever to make partner. She was clear, however, that she does not think dressing in a suit is the main key to success. Rather, it is more important to avoid certain types of clothing, namely anything that could distract from one’s words and work as a professional woman.

She remarked, “Sometimes you see a woman in the office, and when she takes off her jacket you see she is wearing a top that could be mistaken for underwear.” She continued, “If I am noticing it and thinking twice, then other people, both men and women, are probably noticing it too. It will subtly detract from the reputation of her work. You certainly don’t have to wear dark colors and suits every day, but don’t wear anything that could be distracting.”

Dress for the job you want, not the job you have. Women often promise themselves that they will take their image more seriously after they get the promotion. There is a double downside to this approach. If they get the promotion before updating their image, they may be lulled into complacency thinking: I got a promotion and—how bad can I look? If they don’t get the promotion, they may question: What’s the point? I’m obviously not management material.

If you want to be promoted, dress like those at the level above you, not like your peers. Look to more senior women for guidance. At the end of the day, people aren’t that imaginative; they can’t see your potential unless you show it to them.

Be sure to visit our site, WomensMedia to get Expert Advice for Business Women.

Or on our website, WomensMedia you should read:

First Impressions: Making the Most of the First 30 Seconds, or

Communicating With Impact and Influence

For quick updates for Business Women you should follow NancyFClark on twitter here.

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Um, what impression do you, like, get when you, um, hear someone using—you know, words that clutter their language? The adjectives knowledgeable, credible and confident probably don’t come to mind.

I know what you are thinking. “I don’t use the words ‘uh’ and ‘um’.”  Well, that may be true, but there are other words that can prevent you from getting to the point, including “actually,” “you know,” “and,” “so,” “but” and “however. On the other hand, if you never pause, you may instead ramble, take too long to get to the point and frustrate your listeners.

Many speakers use non-words to buy time while they decide what to say, but non-words can be distracting and can cause listeners to misinterpret your message. If you want to communicate with influence you need to replace non-words with a pause. Give your listeners time to hear and understand your message.

Five common reasons why speakers don’t pause:

1. Limited time

No matter how little time you have, it’s imperative that you give listeners time to digest what you’ve said.  If you don’t, they won’t understand your message.

2. Fear of interruptions

Most people interrupt when they’ve stopped listening to what the speaker is saying. All they are listening for is that moment when the speaker finally takes a breath, so they can jump in to add their own two cents or change the subject.

3. Fear of appearing unqualified or unprepared

Your listeners can only conclude that you are knowledgeable if you give them time to think.

4. Fear of losing your place

If you lose your place or forget what you were going to say, it could be because you are using non-words. Most people speak at a rate of about 125 words per minute, whereas they think at a rate of 500 words per minute. Your mind will work for you if you pause.

5. Discomfort with silence

If you fear silence, it is probably because of reason 1, 2, 3 or 4, above. The droning on of a nonstop speaker begins to sound like white noise. White noise lulls people to sleep. That is the silence you should really be afraid of.

Your resistance to pausing will quickly disappear when you begin to experience the benefits.

• Pausing gives listeners a chance to hear, understand and absorb your message. Pausing also invites listeners to share the conversation with you. You are able to adjust your message based on their needs and expectations.

• Pausing creates drama and heightens anticipation.

• Pausing allows you to collect your thoughts and breathe—to relax. Pausing helps you gain control of your message and appear comfortable with your listeners. You are able to communicate more information in less time because you are saying fewer words and giving yourself permission to think on your feet. Pausing allows you to prioritize your thoughts, avoid rambling and get to the point.

Pausing is appropriate in all settings: face-to-face conversations, meetings and group presentations.

• Pause after you ask a question.

• Pause when you want to emphasize a point or idea.

• Pause when you need to take time to gather your thoughts.

• Pause when you want to refer to your notes, PowerPoint slides or other visual aids.

Practice pausing until it becomes a habit.

• Speak in shorter sentences.

• Ask friends and coworkers to tell you when you use non-words. Their feedback will increase your awareness and help you create a new habit of being filler-word free.

• Write PAUSE! on a Post-it® note and display it prominently on your phone or computer.

• When using voicemail, replay your message before you press send so you can listen for pauses and non-words. Re-record the messages until you’re satisfied with what you hear.

• Practice using pauses when you are distributing handouts in meetings, referring to your notes during a face-to-face conversations or waiting for responses to questions.

• Incorporate the pause when you are interacting with visual aids. Avoid talking to charts, slides or the whiteboard; talk instead to your listeners.

In the words of Publilius Syrus, a Latin writer of maxims in the 1^st century B.C. …

“I have never regretted my silence, I have regretted my speech.”

Be sure to visit our site, WomensMedia to get Expert Advice for Business Women.

For quick updates for Business Women you should follow NancyFClark on twitter here, or StaceyHanke here.

Sign up for the WomensMedia Newsletter.  We make it easy!
On our website, WomensMedia you should read this: Business Communication: 5 Tips for Building Your Authority

or this: Differences Between Men and Women: An Interview with Martha Barletta

It may help to listen to Gender Communication with Authority And Care —A Business Woman Can Be Careful Without Losing Her Authority
or read it here.

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By Stacey Hanke (Read about her here.)

(Listen to it here.)

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Have you ever had a conversation with someone whose eyes darted away from you? You might have wondered if they were looking at the stain on your shirt or a hair that was out of place. You probably began to focus on where they were looking rather than what they were saying.

You’d be surprised by the number of individuals I work with who believe they have good eye contact, when in reality they don’t lock eyes with their listeners long enough to create relationships. Relationships are important in business.

Listen to today’s podcast here.

Be sure to visit our site, WomensMedia to get Expert Advice for Business Women.

For quick updates for Business Women you should follow NancyFClark on twitter here, or StaceyHanke here.

Sign up for the WomensMedia Newsletter.  We make it easy!
On our website, WomensMedia you should read this: Add Confidence and Credibility to Your Presentations

or this: Seven Steps to Overcome Your Fear of Public Speaking

It may help to listen to Speak Up: Using Public Speaking to Further Your Career—How To Promote Yourself Without Bragging
or read it here.

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Early in my career I had a boss who was the king of the word but. His coaching sounded something like this: “You’re a strong team player, determined and driven, BUT what we need to work on is …” and “I appreciate your willingness to stay late last night, BUT …”

Every time he complimented me, the compliment would be followed by but. As a result, I stopped listening to what he said before the but and only paid attention to what came after.

Have you ever stopped to consider how many times you use the word but? I’m not saying you can never speak this word again. However, be careful of the context in which you use it. But and however can have negative connotations. For example, suppose you are in the boardroom with your team discussing how to improve sales. A team member says, “I’m really struggling in my territory because most of my clients have cut back on their budgets.” You respond, “I understand it hasn’t been easy, BUT we have a business to run and you need to increase sales.”

Your communication skills can be improved. Listen to my other recommendations, and your business will begin soaring toward success!

Listen to today’s podcast here.

On our website, WomensMedia you should read this: Communicating With Impact and Influence , or this: Be an Effective Listener!

It may help to listen to Powerful Communication For Women —How To Change “I Speak Like A Girl” to “I Know What I’m Talking About”
or read it here.

For quick updates for business women you should follow NancyFClark on twitter here.

by Sharon Michaels (Read about her here.)

(Listen to it here.)

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Over the past 20-plus years, I’ve had the pleasure of starting several business networking groups. Some of these groups have proven to be more successful than others. Through trial and error, I’ve come up with a checklist of what I believe it takes to create a successful and productive networking group.

Listen to today’s podcast here.

Be sure to visit our site, WomensMedia to get Expert Advice for Business Women.

On our website, WomensMedia you should read this: Table-Talking Your Way to Networking or Be Visible — Connect!

For quick updates for Business Women you should follow NancyFClark on twitter here, or SharonMichaels here.

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