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Instead of a lawsuit, I say shine a spotlight on double standards in the workplace.

People will decide what’s not acceptable behavior.

Public opinion brings rapid change, and that’s what we anticipate.

—Nancy Clark

In the Harvard Business Review, Nancy Nichols writes, “Women who attempt to fit themselves into a managerial role by acting like men . . . are forced to behave in a sexually dissonant way. They risk being characterized as ‘too aggressive,’ or worse, just plain ‘bitchy.’ Yet women who act like ladies, speaking indirectly and showing concern for others, risk being seen as ‘ineffective.’”

Women have been caught in a double bind. We’re not part of the #1 team in business—the men’s team. That’s the situation we have today. Let’s not bemoan it—that won’t give us progress. Let’s analyze it and see where we can carve away a few more steps. Kathleen Hall Jamieson tells us, “Binds draw their power from their capacity to simplify complexity. Faced with a complicated situation or behavior, the human tendency is to split apart and dichotomize its elements. So we contrast good and bad, strong and weak, for and against, true and false, and in so doing assume that a person can’t be both at once—or somewhere in between. Such distinctions are often useful. But when this tendency drives us to see life’s options or the choices available to women as polarities and irreconcilable opposites, those differences become troublesome.” Jamieson points out that over the years women have found new options to exercise, so don’t think of yourself as permanently shackled. She states, “Put simply, over time women have learned to turn potatoes into vichyssoise.”

When I’m asked about this problem, I say, “When you see double standards for men and women in action, all you need to do is bring attention to the matter—without anger. Most people will make their own judgment that this is unfair treatment. Those who don’t are not ready to change—this week.”

I don’t promote more laws and more lawsuits as the best way to proceed. Public opinion is ready to change en masse. Instead of a lawsuit, put a spotlight on double standards. Let people decide if this is acceptable behavior. Today we’re seeing that fathers and mothers are worried about sending their daughters out into a workplace that will disappoint them, year after year, with inequities.

Debra Meyerson of Stanford University tells us that if you want to make an effort to change the use of double standards, you have to speak up. For instance, “Jack and Mary both have clients who like them. Jack is arrogant and all you do is laugh about it. But Mary is not nearly as arrogant, yet you criticize her when she does any self-promoting. Why does he get higher marks at promotion time? Doesn’t this look like we’re using double standards? Is this fair?”

Try This: Over the next week, look for instances of double standards being used for men and women in your workplace. Point out the problem without anger if possible. It’s very likely you can enlist a man to second this opinion. Honest, they’re out there ready to help!

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A related article:
WomensMedia, by Debra Meyerson, Gender in Business—Speak Up About Double Standards

See our latest on Forbes

(Listen to it here.)

Be sure to visit our site, http://www.womensmedia.com/ to get Expert Advice for Business Women.

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Starting out in rocket science and computer technology, I was often the only woman in the room.

That’s another way of saying, the stereotype others had of me didn’t fit with the group, I was well aware of these assumptions.

I’ll bet you’ve had the feeling—at one time or another—that people have stuck a stereotype or label on you that made you out to be less than you are.

You may have felt like an outsider to their groups.

In their minds they could be thinking:

• She’s not important,
• She’s not educated,
• She’s not capable,
• She’s not assertive,
• it could even be, “Oh, she’s a mother.” and further questions might end right there.

You can see how this limits the opportunities a person is willing to offer you. In my Business Tip of the Week, I discuss how you can prepare ahead to cancel these negative, incorrect, stereotypes.

Listen to today’s podcast here.

Or on our website, WomensMedia, you may want to read What Keeps Women from Reaching the Top?

For quick business updates you should follow me on twitter here.

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(Listen to it here.)

Finally, and dramatically, public perception has changed!

Five years ago, anyone could say, “ A woman or an African American man cannot be elected President,” and it would be assumed to be true. Now, even though Hillary Clinton did not win, we can picture either type of candidate having a viable chance in the future. Imagine the change: Race or gender no longer eliminates you from becoming President of the United States!

This perception is percolating down into our business world with the outstanding performance of a number of female CEO’s. We have seen that a woman can successfully grow a small company into a major player, such as Meg Whitman did with eBay. She formed a fledgling Internet idea into a company with revenue of 8.46 billion dollars a year. She now has her eye on another arena—politics.

The Rules are Changing

You no longer have to dress like a man or act like a man to reach upper management—the level that was forbidden by the glass ceiling. You can act in a style that’s comfortable to you as long as you show others they can have confidence in you. My Tip of the Week shows you how to do this.

(Listen to it here.)

Be sure to visit our site, www.WomensMedia.com to get Expert Advice for Working Women.

One of the situations that motivates me to keep on bloggin’ is that most working women are not promoted above mid-management positions. This is not what you would expect when 6 out of 10 college diplomas are awarded to women and half our workforce is now female. My goal is to convince each woman to think about why this is happening and to decide this won’t happen to her, and that she’ll do her best to alert other women.

My topic involves the types of jobs we usually see doled out to women.

(Listen to it here.)

Be sure to visit our site, www.WomensMedia.com to get Expert Advice for Working Women.

I like to include the latest research whenever I can so you’ll feel confident when you buck conventional wisdom. However, perfection is tough to measure. If you want the truth, you only have to ask yourself, “Am I guilty of thinking my work is not good enough because it’s not perfect?” Whenever you answer “yes,” I want you to put time above perfection on your priority list and take another look.

In this podcast I tell you 3 setbacks you can suffer by being on the Perfection Hook and in my Tip of the Week, I’ll show you how to start the Perfection Cancellation Process—all for your benefit, little miss perfect!

(Listen to it here.)

Be sure to visit our site, www.WomensMedia.com to get Expert Advice for Working Women.

Starting out in rocket science and computer technology, I was often the only woman in the room.

That’s another way of saying, the stereotype others had of me didn’t fit with the group. I was well aware of these assumptions.

I’ll bet you’ve had the feeling—at one time or another—that people have stuck a stereotype or label on you that made you out to be less than you are.

You may have felt like an outsider to their groups.

In their minds they could be thinking:

• not important,
• not educated,
• not capable,
• not assertive,
• it could even be, “Oh, she’s a mother.” and further questions might end right there.

You can see how this limits the opportunities a person is willing to offer you. In my Tip of the Week, I discuss how you can prepare ahead to cancel these negative, incorrect, stereotypes.

(Listen to it here.)

Be sure to visit our site, www.WomensMedia.com to get Expert Advice for Working Women.

You can’t deny it, in a business environment, as you scan a room of new faces, you notice which are men and which are women. You can’t avoid this. Studies show that we have to decide which gender we’re looking at before we can do anything more. In the fraction of a second before logic sets in, your brain makes use of stereotypes stored there to make things easier for you. Sounds like a good thing? Not if that stereotype whispers to your brain, “She’s probably not important.” as you single out a woman. This certainly is an obstacle for women, but now that you know it, here’s how you can prepare ahead of time to deflect that stereotype as others scope you out and assess your worth from a first impression.

(Listen to it here.)

Be sure to visit our site, www.WomensMedia.com to get Expert Advice for Working Women.

We’ve all encountered a Queen Bee. We know of that woman who wants to be the only female working with men. That’s one rationale. The other one I suspect is that she’s thinking, “I had to work twice as hard as a man to get here . . . so I’m making sure you don’t get it any easier!” If you’re working for a Queen Bee, that’s tough, really tough. She’s a gatekeeper to the glass ceiling—she demands a higher performance from a woman than from a man.

(Listen to it here.)

Be sure to visit our site, www.WomensMedia.com to get Expert Advice for Working Women.

I’ve been receiving requests for more information on leadership styles for women. Of course, the same leadership style will work no matter if you’re a man or a woman, but the questions have been phrased to indicate many women are not comfortable with the autocratic style of leadership, where the leader dominates the team with a one-sided approach to reach an objective.

If you’re not comfortable with that style, there are other choices. Collaboration is one that many women tend toward—what I mean is they can be really, really good at it!

“Men and women aren’t planets apart, but their stereotypes sure are!”

—Nancy Clark

(Listen to it here.)

Be sure to visit our site, www.WomensMedia.com to get Expert Advice for Working Women.

In the recent past you could attract a lot of attention by saying women are different, very different, from men. It was a quick jump to assume that women are nurturing, and that maybe men are not—or that women show empathy, and men do not. It has become a sad state of affairs. As with all trends, this one went too far and now it’s time to reconsider.